addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
