Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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