He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize