doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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