she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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