So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
thus making me awesome and them whores
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
