3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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