I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
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