we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a beard to bite.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize