Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
