i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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