It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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