Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
