I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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