Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I intend to get homeless drunk
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
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