whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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