I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Are my feet made of real feet?
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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