so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
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