Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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