Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
