perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
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In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
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She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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