A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude