wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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