i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
She announced her abortion via fbk
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
The air taste purple.
Randomize
