physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
