I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
