I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
