I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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