Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
