Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
