you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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