I just made out with a guy for $7.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
