how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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