I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
