it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
