Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
