as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
