i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
