she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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