I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.