I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
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when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
how drunk are you?
Several
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize