coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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