wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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