YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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