I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
