so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
