I cannot find my penis.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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