We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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