It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
