Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
