i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Randomize
